mordant wit

The Bush administration: Strong on national defense, fucking pussies when it comes to Senate hearings. Now they tell us Condi will testify under oath to the 9/11 commission. Well, that was easy. Here I was thinking we were dealing with an administration that really believed in the Constitution! Indeed, 'White House has maintained that a member of the president's staff can't appear before a congressionally chartered commission without violating the Constitution's separation of powers.' And Scott McClellan has been steadfast in his conviction that, well, it's the principle of the thing:

March 9: 'Again, this is not her personal preference; this goes back to a matter of principle. There is a separation of powers issue involved here. Historically, White House staffers do not testify before legislative bodies. So it's a matter of principle, not a matter of preference.' [WhiteHouse.gov]

March 17: 'I think this has been previously addressed. It's not a matter of personal preference. You have to look at it as a matter of principle and a separation of powers issue.' [WhiteHouse.gov]

March 22: 'Again, it's not something that's a matter of personal preference. It's a matter of separation of powers. It's a matter of principle.' [WhiteHouse.gov]

March 23: 'There's a principle involved here regarding separation of powers. And I think we previously addressed that, and we've addressed that from the get-go when it comes to this issue. It's not a matter of Dr. Rice's personal preference. It's a matter of principle.' [WhiteHouse.gov]

And you know why they didn't want to fuck with the Constitution, right? Well, they were saving it for marriage.

Sloganator Memorial

while ur at it... check out BushCheneySloganator

Sex stimulates the brain and makes people more intelligent, according to a top German researcher.

Werner Habermehl, from the Hamburg Medical Research Institute, says that regular sexual intercourse promotes intelligence.

He said that love making not only excited the body but also the brain and the increased amount of adrenaline and cortisol hormones that are produced stimulates the grey matter, reported magazine Unicum Campus.

"Sex makes you more intelligent in that experiences are collected that can be used later on in areas of life not linked to sex," said Habermehl.

He added that the added injection of endorphins and serotonin that resulted from an orgasm strengthened self-confidence - giving the body a mental as well as physical work out.

Picking your nose and eating it is one of the best ways to stay healthy, according to a top Austrian doctor.

Innsbruck-based lung specialist Prof Dr Friedrich Bischinger said people who pick their noses with their fingers were healthy, happier and probably better in tune with their bodies.

He says society should adopt a new approach to nose-picking and encourage children to take it up.

Dr Bischinger said: "With the finger you can get to places you just can't reach with a handkerchief, keeping your nose far cleaner.

"And eating the dry remains of what you pull out is a great way of strengthening the body's immune system.

"Medically it makes great sense and is a perfectly natural thing to do. In terms of the immune system the nose is a filter in which a great deal of bacteria are collected, and when this mixture arrives in the intestines it works just like a medicine.

"Modern medicine is constantly trying to do the same thing through far more complicated methods, people who pick their nose and eat it get a natural boost to their immune system for free."

He pointed out that children happily pick their noses, yet by the time they have become adults they have stopped under pressure from a society that has branded it disgusting and anti social.

He said: "I would recommend a new approach where children are encouraged to pick their nose. It is a completely natural response and medically a good idea as well."

And he pointed out that if anyone was really worried about what their neighbour was thinking, they could still enjoy picking their nose in private if they still wanted to get the benefits it offered.

Earth Observatory: Natural Hazards

Earth scientists around the world use NASA satellite imagery to better understand the causes and effects of natural hazards. The goal in sharing these images is to help people visualize where and when natural hazards occur, and to help mitigate their effects. All images in this section are freely available to the public for re-use or re-publication.

5-Minute Video of George W. Bush on the Morning of 9/11

At 9:03 AM on 11 September 2001, the second airplane hit the South Tower of the World Trade Center. President Bush was in Florida, at the Emma T. Booker Elementary School, listening to children read. Chief of Staff Andrew Card came over and whispered in Bush's ear, "A second plane hit the second tower. America is under attack."

What did the Commander in Chief do? Nothing. He sat there. He sat for well over 5 minutes, doing nothing while 3,000 people were dying and the attacks were still in progress.

Not only did the leader of the free world sit as his country was attacked, the Secret Service also did nothing. Bush was appearing in public at a previously announced photo-op. He was a sitting duck. The attacks were ongoing at that point (planes had yet to hit the Pentagon or the field in Pennsylvania), and nobody knew how much more destruction was going to happen. Were there two, three, four, eight more planes hijacked and on their way to crash into prominent buildings? Was one headed for the school, where anyone who checked the President's public itinerary would know he was located? Were other terrorists planning to detonate dirty nukes? Were they going to release anthrax or smallpox or sarin? Was an assassination squad going to burst into the school and get Bush? Was a suicide bomber going to ram a truck full of explosives into that classroom?

During the midst of the attacks, any of these things could've happened. Yet there sits Bush, seemingly unconcerned. His Chief of Staff likewise doesn't think that America in flames warrants the President's immediate attention. And the Secret Service utterly fails to do its job by grabbing the President of the United States and getting him to safety. It's truly inexplicable.

now u gotta c this for urself

Direct link to QuickTime video

Online-Dating Tips

More people are using computers to find that special someone. Here are some tips to help make your online-dating experience safe and fun:

• Under no circumstance should you give someone you meet online a lot of personal information. You could place yourself in the dangerous position of having a date who knows what a loser you are.


• When considering the serious step of marriage, it's good form to seek the approval of the message-board moderator.


• Online dating services provide an easy way for recently divorced singles to meet new and interesting people. It's too bad your ex-wife got to keep the computer.


• When you write your online classified ad, be sure to make explicit the fact that a sense of humor is very important to you.


• Set yourself apart by choosing a descriptive user-name like SocialRetard342 or CuteFaceFatAss.


• If you're having a hard time finding a decent, commitment-minded man through e-dating, why don't you try to e-shut the fuck up for once and stop your e-bitching.


• Don't just tell women what they want to hear. Type it in all caps.


• Remember, online dating is not for everyone - only the desperate and pathetic.


• Dates like to know that they're appreciated. Go the extra mile and send that special someone an e-card or virtual flowers.


• For best results, try whichever dating service happens to be advertised to the right or left of this chart.


• If you decide to break up with your online mate, for God's sake, have the decency to do it over the phone.


• If you're a man who prefers younger women, but you only seem to get responses from older women, take heart: Older women can give birth to younger women.


• When getting together for the first time, arrange to meet online dates in an open, public place. That way, you can use binoculars to check them out


• Don't worry. If you actually meet someone decent over the Internet, the two of you can tell people you met at a party.

The Onion | America's Finest News Source

"It is probably true quite generally that in the history of human thinking the most fruitful developments frequently take place at those points where two different lines of thought meet. These lines may have their roots in quite different parts of human nature, in different times or different cultural environments or different religious traditions: hence if they actually meet, that is, if they are at least so much related to each other that a real interaction can take place, then one may hope that new and interesting developments may follow."

- Werner Heisenberg, founder of quantum mechanics

This email has beeen doing the rounds for so long that i felt it was worth puttin it up here....

"Professing to be wise, they became fools . . .. "

"LET ME EXPLAIN THE problem science has with God."

The atheist professor of philosophy pauses before his class and then asks one of his new students to stand.

"You're a Muslim, aren't you, son?"

"Yes, sir."

"So you believe in God?"

"Absolutely."

"Is God good?"

"Sure! God's good."

"Is God all-powerful? Can God do anything?"

"Yes."

"Are you good or evil?"

"The Koran says I'm evil."

The professor grins knowingly. "Ahh! THE KORAN!" He considers for a moment.

"Here's one for you. Let's say there's a sick person over here and you can cure him. You can do it. Would you help them? Would you try?"

"Yes sir, I would."

"So you're good...!"

"I wouldn't say that."

"Why not say that? You would help a sick and maimed person if you

could...in fact most of us would if we could... God doesn't.

[No answer.]

"He doesn't, does he? My brother was a Muslim who died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him. How is this God good? Hmmm? Can you answer that one?"

[No answer]

The elderly man is sympathetic. "No, you can't, can you?"

He takes a sip of water from a glass on his desk to give the student time to relax. In philosophy, you have to go easy with the new ones.

"Let's start again, young fella." "Is God good?"

"Er... Yes."

"Is Satan good?"

"No."

"Where does Satan come from?" The student falters.

"From... God..."

"That's right. God made Satan, didn't he?" The elderly man runs his bony fingers through his thinning hair and turns to the smirking, student audience.

"I think we're going to have a lot of fun this semester, ladies and gentlemen."

He turns back to the Muslim. "Tell me, son. Is there evil in this world?"

"Yes, sir."

"Evil's everywhere, isn't it? Did God make everything?"

"Yes."

"Who created evil?

[No answer]

"Is there sickness in this world? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All the terrible things - do they exist in this world? "

The student squirms on his feet. "Yes."

"Who created them? "

[No answer]

The professor suddenly shouts at his student. "WHO CREATED THEM? TELL ME, PLEASE!"

The professor closes in for the kill and climbs into the Muslim's face.

In a still small voice "God created all evil, didn't He, son?"

[No answer]

The student tries to hold the steady, experienced gaze and fails. Suddenly the lecturer breaks away to pace the front of the classroom like a aging panther. The class is mesmerized.

"Tell me," he continues, "How is it that this God is good if He created all evil throughout all time?"

The professor swishes his arms around to encompass the wickedness of the world.

"All the hatred, the brutality, all the pain, all the torture, all the death and ugliness and all the suffering created by this good God is all over the world, isn't it, young man?"

[No answer]

"Don't you see it all over the place? Huh?"

Pause.

"Don't you?" The professor leans into the student's face again and whispers, "Is God good?"

[No answer]

"Do you believe in God, son?"

The student's voice betrays him and cracks. "Yes, professor. I do."

The old man shakes his head sadly. "Science says you have five senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Have you? "

"No, sir. I've never seen Him."

"Then tell us if you've ever heard your God?"

"No, sir. I have not."

"Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God or smelt your God...in fact, do you have any sensory perception of your God whatsoever?"

[No answer]

"Answer me, please."

"No, sir, I'm afraid I haven't."

"You're AFRAID... you haven't?"

"No, sir."

"Yet you still believe in him?"

"...yes..."

"That takes FAITH!" The professor smiles sagely at the underling. "According to the rules of empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your God doesn't exist. What do
you say to that, son? Where is your God now?"

[The student doesn't answer]

"Sit down, please."

The Muslim sits...Defeated.

Another Muslim raises his hand. "Professor, may I address the class?"

The professor turns and smiles. "Ah, another Muslim in the vanguard! Come, come, young man. Speak some proper wisdom to the gathering."

The Muslim looks around the room.

"Some interesting points you are making, sir. Now I've got a question for you. Is there such thing as heat?"

"Yes," the professor replies. "There's heat."

"Is there such a thing as cold?"

"Yes, son, there's cold too."

"No, sir, there isn't."

The professor's grin freezes. The room suddenly goes very cold.

The second Muslim continues. "You can have lots of heat, even more heat, super-heat, mega-heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat but we don't have anything called 'cold'. We can hit 458 degrees below zero, which is no heat, but we can't go any further after that.

There is no such thing as cold, otherwise we would be able to go colder than 458 - You see, sir, cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat we can measure in thermal units because heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it."

Silence. A pin drops somewhere in the classroom.

"Is there such a thing as darkness, professor?"

"That's a dumb question, son. What is night if it isn't darkness? What are you getting at...?"

"So you say there is such a thing as darkness?"

"Yes..."

"You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is not something, it is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light but if you have no light constantly you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it?

That's the meaning we use to define the word. In reality, Darkness isn't. If it were, you would be able to make darkness darker and give me a jar of it. Can you...give me a jar of darker darkness, professor?"

Despite himself, the professor smiles at the young effrontery before him.

This will indeed be a good semester. "Would you mind telling us what your point is, young man?"

"Yes, professor. My point is, your philosophical premise is flawed to start with and so your conclusion must be in error...."

The professor goes toxic. "Flawed...? How dare you...!""

"Sir, may I explain what I mean?"

The class is all ears.

"Explain... oh, explain..." The professor makes an admirable effort to regain control. Suddenly he is affability itself. He waves his hand to silence the class, for the student to continue.

"You are working on the premise of duality," the Muslim explains. "That for example there is life and then there's death; a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science cannot even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism but has never seen, much less fully understood them. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, merely the
absence of it."

The young man holds up a newspaper he takes from the desk of a neighbor who has been reading it. "Here is one of the most disgusting tabloids this country hosts, professor. Is there such a thing as immorality?"

"Of course there is, now look..."

"Wrong again, sir. You see, immorality is merely the absence of morality. Is there such thing as injustice? No. Injustice is the absence of justice. Is there such a thing as evil?" The Muslim pauses. "Isn't evil the absence of good?"

The professor's face has turned an alarming color. He is so angry he is temporarily speechless.

The Muslim continues. "If there is evil in the world, professor, and we all agree there is, then God, if he exists, must be accomplishing a work through the agency of evil. What is that work, God is accomplishing? The Quran tells us it is to see if each one of us will, of our own free will, choose good over evil."

The professor bridles. "As a philosophical scientist, I don't vie this matter as having anything to do with any choice; as a realist, I absolutely do not recognize the concept of God or any other theological factor as being part of the world equation because God is
not observable."

"I would have thought that the absence of God's moral code in this world is probably one of the most observable phenomena going," the Muslim replies. "Newspapers make billions of dollars reporting it every week! Tell me, professor. Do you teach your students that they
evolved from a monkey?"

"If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, young man, yes, of course I do."

"Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?"

The professor makes a sucking sound with his teeth and gives his student a silent, stony stare.

"Professor. Since no-one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you now not a scientist, but a priest?"

"I'll overlook your impudence in the light of our philosophical discussion. Now, have you quite finished?" the professor hisses.

"So you don't accept God's moral code to do what is righteous?"

"I believe in what is - that's science!"

"Ahh! SCIENCE!" the student's face splits into a grin. "Sir, you rightly state that science is the study of observed phenomena. Science too is a premise which is flawed..." "SCIENCE IS FLAWED..?" the professor splutters.

The class is in uproar. The Muslim remains standing until the commotion has subsided.

"To continue the point you were making earlier to the other student, may I give you an example of what I mean?"

The professor wisely keeps silent.

The Muslim looks around the room. "Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the professor's brain?"

The class breaks out in laughter. The Muslim points towards his elderly, crumbling tutor.

"Is there anyone here who has ever heard the professor's brain... felt the professor's brain, touched or smelt the professor's brain?"

No one appears to have done so. The Muslim shakes his head sadly. "It appears no-one here has had any sensory perception of the professor's brain whatsoever. Well, according to the rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science, I DECLARE that the professor has no brain."

The class is in chaos.

The Muslim sits... Because that is what a chair is for.

HypraSpeed 2

Cool racing game that could raise serious questions about your powers of coordination.

Seven hours' sleep "the safest"

People who sleep for eight hours or more every night have a higher death rate than those who average six to seven hours, according to a new US study. But many sleep experts are sceptical about the findings.

u betta get yo lazy ass up frm tht bed... n start livin!!!

What is God?

In an attempt to resolve any disagreement surrounding the meaning of the word 'God', TPM has assembled a crack team of 'metaphysical engineers' who have devised a new computer-modelling virtual environment in which to test the plausibility of different conceptions of God.


OR

Battleground God

How one of the two brains behind the Iran-Contra scandal this week became one of America's most powerful men

by John Sutherland
Guardian

Monday February 18, 2002

Last Wednesday something strange happened. The American population was instructed to panic. Place themselves, that is, on a state of highest vigilance. Some cataclysmic act of terrorism would happen - within hours. But nothing terrible happened. Something creepy did. On Thursday there was an inconspicuous news item. John M Poindexter had been appointed to head a new agency "to counter attacks on the US", such as Wednesday's no-show. It is equivalent, in British terms, to Jeffrey Archer being made chancellor of the exchequer.

The agency which Poindexter will run is called the Information Awareness Office. You want to know what that is? Think, Big Brother is Watching You. IAO will supply federal officials with "instant" analysis on what is being written on email and said on phones all over the US. Domestic espionage. You want to test it out? Text-message any American friend, "Bmb OK. Allah gr8".

The IAO is one of two new offshoots of the Pentagon-based Darpa - the Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency (it's venerable ancestor, Arpa, invented the internet). The other new agency is called the Information Exploitation Office. Its mission is to supply similarly instant analysis about overseas enemy targets. IEO will employ the computerised sensor networks that have proved so successful in Afghanistan. And, from now on, America - with IEO guiding its smart weaponry - will launch sneak attacks. No more Mr Nice Guy.

IOA and IEO will get a big chunk of the $48bn of the taxpayers' money George Bush is pumping into his war on the evildoers. Never again will it be said that US intelligence agencies went to sleep on the job - or that they were too careful about the American citizen's civil rights to do that job. No more Mr Scrupulous Guy.

Poindexter is frighteningly smart and very unscrupulous. He graduated top of his class at the Naval Academy in 1958 and went on to a PhD in physics at the California Institute of Technology. He returned to uniform as America's best-educated sailor. He wasn't a desk warrior. Poindexter commanded missile destroyers. He won medals to hang alongside his academic diplomas. He is the model for Tom Clancy's hero, Jack Ryan.

After the assassination attempt on President Reagan in 1981, Poindexter was called in to review White House security. Reagan was impressed and appointed him a national security adviser, in 1983, with the rank of vice-admiral.

At this point, things started to go wrong. He and Oliver North were found to be up to their necks in the Iran-Contra (guns for hostages) scam, which blew up in 1986. Poindexter was charged and found guilty of conspiracy, obstruction of justice, and the destruction of evidence in 1990; this was overturned on appeal the following year. The case against them was that they meticulously wiped out 5,000 incriminating emails - but forgot about the back-up tapes. Even smart guys goof sometimes.

Poindexter was also accused by a Costa Rican government commission of being involved in cocaine trafficking to raise funds for the contras, though this was never proved (you can find details in the Guardian, July 22 1989).

His excuse for his behaviour was brazen: "I made a very deliberate decision not to tell the president so that I could insulate him from the decision and provide some future deniability for the president if it ever leaked out." In other words, he gave himself the right to run America's foreign policy behind the back of the commander in chief. Who the hell voted for John M Poindexter?

Both North and Poindexter have gone on to do well. North has a radio chat programme that rivals Rush Limbaugh in rightwing virulence. Poindexter was recruited by Syntek Technologies, a firm in bed with Darpa. His hand was back in the hi-tech cookie jar. As a company vice-president, Poindexter helped develop Genoa - an "intelligence mining, information harvesting" system designed to explore (clandestinely) large computer databases. Listen in on America's electronic conversations, that is.

Poindexter is, once again, one of the most powerful men in America. His job description is "crisis manager". How do you put a man with Poindexter's record back in the manager's box? Well, a spurious crisis would be convenient. Now do you understand what was going on last Wednesday - or must I spell it out for you?

Actual Article

old article but makes u think abt whts goin on in the american govts decision makin circles.

Replacement for DVD unveiled

The world's Big Nine electronics companies have swallowed corporate pride and agreed on a single standard and name - Blu-Ray - for the next generation video and computer optical disc. Although good for the consumer, they are putting the future of their fledgling recordable DVD systems in jeopardy.

now tht we've all spent fortunes on acquirin the latest in DVD tech... they've come up wid another format to complicate things up.

submarine

think of it as ur very own personal Nautilus ;)

Reverse Speech: Official Site of Reverse Speech Technologies

Ant City

Hunt the Boeing! And test your perceptions!

As everyone knows, on 11 September, less than an hour after the attack on the World Trade Centre, an airplane collided with the Pentagon. The Associated Press first reported that a booby-trapped truck had caused the explosion. The Pentagon quickly denied this. The official US government version of events still holds. Here's a little game for you: Take a look at these photographs and try to find evidence to corroborate the official version. It's up to you to Hunt the Boeing!

it just makes u wonder!!! how can ppl buy the official version of the story... they'll haf to be INCREDIBLY stupid.... no offense to all those who believe all tht BS!

Mikroworld - home of Mikroman

sumthin kewl n interestin... cant make head or tail of it though

rubiks cube

The Always Amusing Euphemism Generator

The Euphemism Generator can create up to 158,086,842 unique phrases!

But there's always room for more.

Southern Astrological Signs

It has become pretty obvious to us Southerners that our present astrological signs have served their purpose and that we should get rid of them. When I'm out driving around I'll see bulls, and once in a great while I suppose I'll even see a ram. Up the street from me there's some twins, but I don't see them much. The rest of the things are just too obscure. You only see crabs on vacation. There are no lions or scorpions, not many archers and no water bearers. Virgins? The neighborhood's not crawling with them either.

So... what we need here is some relevance. We need things we can recognize up there in the night sky.

Online Etch A Sketch

End of Existence aka "We're all fucked"

A quiz and flash presentation to cheer you up as the Americans start waving their wedding tackle at the Iraqis, the Indians and Pakistani's eye each other over the Kashmiri border and Israel and the Palestinians trade punches.

The Cyborg Name Generator

As Jung observed in his seminal work Der Sechsmilliondeutchmarkmann, each of us has within our soul a desire to know what our name would stand for if we were a cyborg. At long last, we have the technology.

The Earth may be on the brink of a sixth mass extinction on a par with the five others that have punctuated its history, suggests the strongest evidence yet.

Butterflies in Britain are going extinct at an even greater rate than birds, according to the most comprehensive study ever of butterflies, birds, and plants.

Read full story here.

i am an unelaborate airborne fax machine!!

what are you???

If you don't have time to go thru 1000+ odd pages and 10 hours of viewing just see the whole story below... its a "lil" condensed :P

<

Can u believe these bytches?!?!?! the arrogrant bastardz!!!

How to make your neighbourhood unsafe?

this is soooooper hilarious..... check this shit out.... this is so kewl... i wanna get this shit for maself as well ;)

Home-made Bikini Contest

Caddillac Couches

So my son couldn't say dumptruck, what's the big deal?

this is hilaaaaaaaaaaaaaarious .... gives an idea wht the parents r doin in the bedroom ;)

Kewl art by Yuko Shimizu

Bush Introduces Homo Alert System
by Nicki Jones

President Bush on Thursday announced the creation of a new alert system that will allow the country to know current risk levels of homosexuality at any given time. The system will coordinate risk factors with current US intelligence to determine the level of risk homosexuals pose to modern civilization as we know it. Masterminded by Dick Cheney’s lesbian daughter, Mary, working in collaboration with Newt Gingrich’s lesbian sister, and Ronald Reagan’s gay son, the program will access the latest cultural trends and factor in the gay agenda, making all Americans aware of the current status of homosexuality within our borders. Also helping with the project were Jenna and Barbara Bush, the President’s twin daughters, but only that one time when they were really really drunk.

Recent success of television shows like Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, the L Word, Will and Grace, and Queer as Folk have put our current risk level at Orange Alert... don’t drop the soap. President Bush issued a press release warning the country to keep their boxers on frontwards in the face of this impending danger that threatens the very fabric of our survival as a species.

Also putting America at risk is the stubborn insistence of some big city mayors to uphold the US Constitution by administering gay weddings across the country, despite public outcry from mostly frumpish, oftentimes divorced, disgruntled straight voters who can’t bear to see anyone happy.

Last week on an episode of Pat Robertson’s The 700 Club, Reverend Jerry Falwell blamed the terrorist bombing in Madrid, Spain on gay weddings happening here, right now, in America. Falwell has endorsed Bush’s Homo Alert System because “it will make God loving normal people aware of their sinful c&*# licking and c#$& sucking neighbors.”

"And by the way," Falwell added, "Spain is full of a bunch of fags. The Bible says so."


Actual article

Rude Place Names

What happens when bored morons get hold of a geographical database? This. One afternoon myself and a bunch of friends produced this reasonably complete list of rude place names, ranging from the innocuous innuendo straight through to words that... err.

Ronaldinho's amazing footwork

Well here a ShittyAdvice.com we are constantly striving to bring you the worst advice possible, and we are reaching that goal every day in every way. But, we have been adding new ways for you to know we have new advice, and if you just have a quick question, we can give you some quick shitty advice too!

CuriousMath.com: Math is an attitude

Want to learn how to quickly square a number that ends in 5? Or how to tell if a number is divisible by 3? Or maybe you'd like to know why the number 153 in the Bible is such an interesting number? That's the kind of fun and fascinating math tricks and trivia you'll find here at CuriousMath.com

Pink Floyd Tribute

Now what could be the smartest choice for the future?

How To Dance Properly

GOW: Girl of the Week

monowheels

And other vehicles with insufficient wheels.

Aktfotók a netrõl, I have no idea what that means, but do you care?

PUKE or SOUP???: Can you tell the difference?

and u gotta have a little stomach to see it all.... i don care if some of them r soups... but i din like the sight of them

Vagina Paintings by ~J~: Banned by eBay



Here is an idea of my process: I use pre-primed canvas panels and acrylic paints. Lying on my back and using brushes of different sizes, I apply the paint around my shaved vagina and onto my inner thighs in whatever pattern and colors strike me. Once I get the paint on the way I like it, I lift my legs up and spread them open as wide as I can. Then I press the canvas panel against my vagina and the painted area around it, transferring the paint to the canvas.

Anybody up for penis art?!?!!? :P

WhoWhatWhen: Interactive Historical Timelines

WhoWhatWhen is a database of people and events from 1000 A.D. to the present. Create graphic timelines of periods in history and of the lives of individuals.

I wonder if this historical record keeping is going to end during monkey face "dubya" bush's time. i sure hope that the planet and all of humanity will survive it all.

Fiat 500 vs Porsche 911

The Big Lebowski Random Quote Generator

• Keep your fucking ugly goldbrickin' ass out of my beach community.
• You're not dealing with morons here
• What is that, yoga?

Where do these quotes come from? The amazingly delicious Coen Brothers movie starring Jeff Bridges, John Goodman, Julianne Moore, and Steve Buscemi. Money, mistakes, nihilism, and, of course, bowling.

[Big Brother] - Uncensored

u gotta c this to knw why this show is so popular ;)

Taiwan aims high to build world's tallest tower

They don't come any bigger or stronger than Taipei 101 - the world's tallest building, which is reportedly being built to such strict structural standards that it may even be able to withstand a 9/11-like strike by a jumbo jet.
Engineers in Taipei are putting the finishing touches to the 508 metre (1,667ft) tower, being constructed as a symbol of the resurgent identity of Taiwan.

When it opens at the end of this year or early next, its 101 floors and tall telecommunications antenna will take it past the 452 metre twin Petronas Towers in Kuala Lumpur as the world tallest building. It will also have the world's fastest lifts, taking passengers from the ground to the top floor in 39 seconds - at a stomach churning 40mph.


u betta not take lunch before u intend to travel in those lifts:P

Some images of this amazingly massive structure
Pics and Stats

NASA hears words not yet spoken

A person using the subvocal system thinks of phrases and talks to himself so quietly it cannot be heard, but the tongue and vocal cords do receive speech signals from the brain

The heading gives u the creeepss..... u knw... readin thoughts n shit... but then again... pretty kewl shit they've come up wid.

Minarets Rise in Germany

The chink and scrape of stonecutters echo through the gray-domed mosque that rises like a glimmer of misplaced architecture in a city where the Muslim call to prayer is a widening whisper.

Dusted in marble, workmen scurry in the muted glow of stained glass. Some paint Koranic verses on the walls; others make last-minute alterations to golden-tipped minarets pricking a drizzly skyline. Anxious Berliners sometimes peek into the courtyard, where Ali Gulcek, a husky, nimble man, assures them his religion is not a threat.

The Israeli oppression of Palestinians takes a surreal turn

When Palestinian residents of the besieged West Bank town of Ramallah turned on their TVs over the weekend, what they encountered was neither news nor any of the usual Palestinian Authority programming; they encountered pornographic movie clips.

Three of the four TV stations in Ramallah, headquarters of Yasser Arafat, had been occupied by Israeli troops. The town's remaining TV station was meanwhile running a crawl at the bottom of the screen explaining that the porn clips were the work of the occupying forces. "We urge parents to take precautions," it read.


These israeli bytches r so fuckin %*&^%!!!!

Guinness record for world's smallest disk drive

Japan's Toshiba Corp said on Tuesday that Guinness World Records had certified its stamp-sized hard disk drives (HDDs) as the smallest in the world.

Palm Handheld Camera

This nifty lil thing is the next on my purchase list to compliment my Palm Tungsten T3!!!

check it out

Immortalizer Technologies

Immortalizer Technologies are the big things that haven't been invented yet. In short, they're future inventions that will guarantee a permanent spot in the history books for whoever invents them.

Porsche Engine Sound Quiz

Try n see how much u score on the quiz n gauge how big a porsche fan r u.... but even if ur not..... the sounds r so sweeeeet tht the whole experience was orgasmic ;)

Narwal



In the late 19th Century, few of those who read Jules Verne’s exciting tale of the search for the Submarine Nautilus understood that it was more than just an entertaining fiction. Much of the true story was suppressed by the authorities. Professor Aronnax was in fact an agent of the French Government. By means of the secrets he carried away when the Professor and his party escaped from the Nautilus and from information found at Nemo’s mysterious island base, the French were able to construct an improved copy of the fantastic submarine. This submarine ram, launched in 1889, they named the Narwal. It was the first of several similar submarines launched by the major governments of the world. Their avowed purpose, to hunt down Nemo and his pirate submarine.

StickDeath

ZipZaps SE micro RC

Safe For Work Porn

Funny shit! not p0rn!

Artificial exoskeleton takes the strain

A human exoskeleton, which could help soldiers and fire-fighters carry heavy loads, is about to take its first public steps.

Called the Berkeley Lower Extremity Exoskeleton, or BLEEX, it is part of a Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency venture designed to help foot soldiers carry heavier loads over even longer distances, by connecting robotic supports to their legs to reduce the load.

While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot slightly off the floor and make clockwise circles with your foot. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right hand. Your foot will change direction..... counter clockwise...

You can't help it!

White House To Seek Ban On Gay Sex On The Moon

Worried by flagging poll numbers, a deteriorating situation in Iraq, and a sluggish economy, President Bush called on Congress today to approve a constitutional amendment that would ban gay sex on the Moon. Republican leaders hailed the move as a bold step to unite the country in a bold and forward-looking strategy to spread family values across the solar system, and protect the legacy of the Apollo missions.

The guy in the 0val office is so dumb one can almost believe this!!!

You too can build thunderous and exciting Matchstick Rockets

Plugging into the power of sewage

The waste you flush down the toilet could one day power the lights in your home. So say researchers at Pennsylvania State University who last week revealed they have developed an electricity generator fuelled by sewage

Now that is one cool device. The more you crap the more television you can watch!!!

"You say that we've got nothing in common
No common ground to start from
And we're falling apart
You'll say the world has come between us
But I know you just don't care

An I said, 'What about Breakfast at Tiffany's'"

'Can YOU Be A Porn Star?'

Mary Carey, the porn actress who ran for California governor in the recent recall election, is among the hosts, joining fellow adult-film stars Tabitha Stevens and Ginger Lynn.

Silhouette Productions announced plans Monday to shoot seven one-hour shows, with plans to start broadcasting on iN DEMAND Networks and other pay-per-view channels on Jan. 8.

A group of 28 women will compete for a one-year contract with a major adult video distributor and a cash prize of $100,000.

Now that is what I call American Entertainment!!! And this happens to be the same country that was outraged at Janet Jackson's boob eXposure!!!

BMW's Easter Egg: Inside stuff: A hidden feature launches the M3, but faster in Europe

There's a cheat code in the software running the BMW M3's sequential manual gearbox (SMG): Press the right buttons in the right order and the car will launch you from a stop after revving the engine to 5,000 rpm. But don't look for a how-to in the owners' manual—this feature is undocumented, an inside joke of sorts.

Attention women: until your farts start smelling like cinnamon buns, quit bitching.

I'm tired of women bitching when guys fart. Farting around a woman is like listening to a radio permanently stuck on the wailing bitch station: "I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU FARTED." Yeah it's real hard to believe that guys have the ability to let out air from their colons, call Ripley.

HahAhahaAhaaa!!!! And any feminist reading this... blame the actual site not the weblog :P

History of the Blowjob

Most people don't know it, but the blowjob was invented in 1972. It came out of the New York "swingers" scene. The American government supported the blowjob movement--it was seen as a way to get the average American back to work in a shorter amount of time. Before 1972, America workers spent an average of 80 hours a week in sexual congress with their wives.

Another American concept!!! I am amazed at how this nation finds time to think of these things!

Where Is THAT?: The game where your mind is your map.

Awful Plastic Surgery: "the good, bad, and ugly of celebrity plastic surgery"

Breasts, Tits or Jugs? A Primer

These are what your mother, boss, wife and long term girlfriend have. They are available for private showings, but mostly are not to be brushed up against or acknowledged in public with anything more than cursory glances. Breasts are part of a whole person, and are to be regarded, at least on most occasions, with the same inert response one gives arms or earlobes.

Ten Things: Tits

Or: The Puritanical Streak in This Country Makes Me Want to Bare My Breasts

Hot Rod Speedstrip Applicator Condoms

In the heat of the moment you don't want to be fumbling around trying to work your way into a condom. Heck, if you fumble around long enough you'll ruin the mood!

What I can't believe is that people actually think about how they can improve their condom experience and come up with innovative designs. Some people seem to have a lot of time on their hands and sex on their minds.

The race last Sunday in Melbourne was no different than almost any other last season. Schumi up front at the start and at the finish. Something else that wasn't different from last season was seen in the pitlane.

Members of HugNation have one core belief:
They would rather Hug you than hurt you.

George W. Bush recently displayed a glimpse of his dark side as he partook in a public display of racial insensitivity.

Before speaking to a March 3rd Los Angeles audience at the White House Conference on Faith-Based and Community Initiatives, Mr Bush was introduced by an African-American male, whose head Mr Bush proceeded to rub while grinning and smirking.

Read it all here.

How to succeed with women, virtually Online computer users often engage in what is affectionately known as "cybersex". Often the fantasies typed into keyboards and shared through Internet phone lines get pretty raunchy. However, as you'll see below, one of the two cyber-surfers in the following transcript of an online chat doesn't seem to quite get the point of cyber sex. Then again, maybe he does...

Unused space on hard drives recovered?

Interesting results to date:
Western Digital 200GB SATA
Yield after recovery: 510GB of space

IBM Deskstar 80GB EIDE
Yield after recovery: 150GB of space

Maxtor 40GB EIDE
Yield after recovery: 80GB

Seagate 20GB EIDE
Yield after recovery: 30GB

Unknown laptop 80GB HDD
Yield: 120GB

Geroge W. Bush Jr. @ Hotmail

This conversation is real. It took place over AOL Instant Messenger. Only the names have been changed to protect starcrftmaniac and PunkgirlAngl, I mean, the innocent.

A car by the women and for the women - l0lzzzzZZz. Now that is something interesting - a car designed by women *giggle* *giggle* and for the women. What really is interesting is 'what women want' ................ in a car of course!!!!


In the beginning, the team had met some difficulties related to the fact that women take more time to discuss things, to question a lot. The project was so much delayed that they had to start again. Then "Eve" was created: the premium independent woman, a target customer for whom the car was going to be designed. Eve wants all a man wants, and more. Her list is longer. She wants to store her bag and cellphone in a safe place, wants hassle-free parking, wants to get in and out of the car easily and in elegant style. She wants a vehicle that's ideal to park and easy to maintain.


OK. So its easy to park, but how does that chick get outta da car when there isn't much space between parked cars n u gotta operate those doors that swing up and need a little bit of space to do that. Just shows how much thought went into the making.


See one of the reviews here.

And another review here.

Naturally, you'll be wondering what an erudite gentleman such as I would be doing with such a list on his site. A few summers ago, I had the pleasure of shooting a documentary on rodeos. It was a wonderful experience, with one exception. PA announcers at rodeos have this terrible predisposition towards playing country music at high decibel levels, virtually non-stop.

• When You Wrapped My Lunch in a Road Map, I Knew You Meant Good-Bye
• Mama Get The Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)
• Lay Something On My Bed Besides A Blanket

and many more.

MOBA: Art Too Bad To Be Ignored

The Museum Of Bad Art (MOBA) is the world's only museum dedicated to the collection, preservation, exhibition and celebration of bad art in all its forms.

The pieces in the MOBA collection range from the work of talented artists that have gone awry to works of exuberant, although crude, execution by artists barely in control of the brush. What they all have in common is a special quality that sets them apart in one way or another from the merely incompetent.

When the Backstreet Boys made their professional debut in Europe, on May 5, 1996, those back home blew the quintet off as a New Kids On The Block knockoff. Thirty million album sales later, the Backstreet Boys are a bona-fide worldwide sensation. Teen girls and adult women alike swoon to their good looks and smooth harmonies, imagining latenight serenades with Nick, AJ, Brian, Howie, or Kevin. But whom do the Backstreet Boys fantasize about?

The planet Earth has had some weird and terrible rulers in it's time. But George W Bush is a leader with immeasurable power and intelligence that's hard to measure. Our future depends on his skills and judgement. Will he be a "good ancestor", or will he prove to be the "Weakest Missing Link".

Top Ten Rules of Indian Film-Making

The OED "b" definition says a merkin is a "counterfeit hair for women's privy parts," and another dictionary calls it a "pubic hair wig." Sorry, but these explanations defy understanding. I mean, I've heard of niche markets, but this is ridiculous.

Read the complete Straight Dope here.

Bediquette

This isn't a porn site, people (contrary to what some of you seem to think). However, you do need to know how to behave properly in the bedroom, regardless of how often you choose to entertain guests there. Our role is not to give you sex tips (there are Internet sites aplenty for that), so stop asking for them.

A boy should never push a girl's head down, to "encourage" oral sex. If she wants to do it, she will. And by the way, your aggressiveness on the issue will make it significantly less likely.

Slugs: Adidas

Here's proof that maybe Canadians are more passionate about ice hockey than the British are about football.

Bill Gates: "Buy stamps to send e-mail."

On the day i was born, the #1 single was:
Abba - "Super Trouper"

and the #1 album was:
Abba - "Super Trouper"

What was ur #1?

Retro TV Intro's

Welcome to Evert's Retro TV Intro site, here you find intro's of TV shows that I watched as a kid, and I'm sure you also watched a few of these, they don't make em like these anymore!

Original Tattoo'd Clothing

The only clothing that gives you the illusion of tattoos

Article by Shaikh Aziz


A honeymooning couple in an English countryside visits an old abandoned castle and its buildings. While entering its chapel, its rusted door opens with a shrilling sound which does not frighten them, but a spooky feeling goes down their spines.

"I feel sorrowful," said the man.

"But I feel cold," was the reply from the woman.

"Not afraid, sure?"

"Not the least."

They continued their sojourn. They were well-read and didn't believe in ghosts and witches. Since the townspeople had told them that ghosts used to visit the castle and chapel, anxiety drove them to see both that what they could experience. They visited almost all places and corners of the fort and chapel. At times, they felt chilled when an old window would open and occasionally loneliness gripped them. However, they toured both places extensively, adding to their experiences.

On their way back to the hotel, they again met the townspeople and shared their encounters. The people wanted them to believe that the feelings they experienced were in fact the effects of ghosts who did not want to be disturbed. To the couple this was a paranormal phenomenon, but the inquisitive couple wanted a scientific explanation. They might not have been to get an immediate answer to their tantalizing question, but in September 2003, a group of scientists belonging to the National Physical Laboratory, Tedington (UK) provided that clarification. The scientists termed the phenomenon as soundless music or 'infrasound' that is inaudible to the human ear, but has a deeper effect on human beings.

They arranged a concert of 750 listeners and set a composition comprising various frequencies. When the concert was over, they studied certain effects of the composition on the listeners. Twenty-two per cent of them expressed a strange feeling, without attributing any obvious reasons for it, but affirmed that they could only feel it through their bodies. Some of them said that at certain pieces of the composition, they felt shivers down the spine, others had a feeling of extreme sorrow, the rest felt coldness, anxiety, raised heartbeat and butterflies in the stomach. The concert was repeated the next day with another audience and the same reaction was recorded.

Apparently, the concerts were organized to observe the physical reaction of soundless music, often attributed to supernatural powers and ghostly appearance at religious revelations. It has been an old perception throughout the world that ghosts and other supernatural forces do exist at secluded places, buildings of worship, graveyards and abandoned structures. Mysterious stories have been ascribed to haunted places where people encounter unfamiliar emotions.

The scientific explanation to this is 'infrasound' that is created by the friction of windows, whistling sound created by air passing through broken planks, shrieking sounds of the opening and closing of the rusted doors of a building that has not been visited for quite some time. Besides the audible sound, there is always the inaudible sound creating certain emotions not understandable to the visitor. This occurs naturally and can be created artificially, too, as in the case of National Physical Laboratory, Tedington concerts. Sounds created by winds, thunder or animal groaning are a few sources of this infrasound. Among man-made sources such as screeching of metals, opening and closing of gateways and windows, traffic noise and musical instruments play the same role.

The infrasound phenomenon is based on the simple rule of acoustic physics, according to which the human ear cannot hear sound below 20 Hertz (Hz). A Hertz is a number of cycles per second. Sound below 20 Hz is called infrasound while beyond 20 kHz is termed as ultrasound. A human ear cannot hear a sound below 20 Hz. In other words, a sound reaches the human ear but remains inaudible, however, some humans can detect it which is often described as "a throbbing hum that goes throughout the body."

In the case of the Tedington experiment, an organist was allowed to perform during which bursts of 17 Hz were released periodically, without informing the audience that what they were listening. After the performance, various results came about which would form the basis of further research on the sound discipline and musical effects on human behaviour. The full results of the experiment will be made public by the British Association for the Advancement of Sciences soon, but till now it has been proved that the sound of various frequencies affects human emotions in varying ways.

That music has been the main source of affecting human behaviour has never been disputed. Human beings have been feeling the effects for many thousands of years, but have never been able to find a scientific clue to it. When the West first encountered our music and its effects on human beings, they could not comprehend its effects owing to the intricacies of our music. The mechanism of our musical system is based on the frequencies of shruties or microtones. Every note has a number of shruties, which when applied appropriately creates certain feelings in the listener. The effect is called 'Rasa' which means taste, essence of a sentiment or a resultant emotion.

These shruties have been attributed certain colours and physical effects which they transmit when heard in the manner infrasound applies. The concept of applying various notes in certain manner as Durbal (weak), Varjat (ignore), etc, comes from that skill of application of the notes in certain frequencies. After long exercise of application of these notes, our great grandmasters came out with nine physical effects on the human emotions or the nine Rasas every composition creates. They are: Rati - pleasure, amusement, affection or passion; Hasiya - laughter, merriment; Shoka - sorrow, grief; Krodha - anger, wrath; Utsaha - effort, determination, perseverance, firmness, fortitude; Bhaya - fear, alarm, terror; Jagupsa - censure, dislike, disgust; Vismaya -wonder, surprise, admiration and Shanta - tranquillity, rest, absence of passion and restraint of senses.

According to our traditional theory of music, when a certain composition is performed, the listener's feelings are stimulated. One kind of stimulation is the general one and becomes quite obvious effecting all listeners; the other one is only felt through certain symptoms like palpitation of the heart, drying of the mouth, sadness, brightening of the face, etc. These kind of reactions are no more but the effects of the infrasound or the inaudible sound. One of the important effect of music listening in our system is that it intensifies the already prevailing feeling a listener bears. For instance, if someone is in a pensive mood, when he hears some sombre sound he would get more melancholy. This is what Ronald Wiseman, the expert who organized the Tedington concert, observed about the reactions of infrasound.

Of course, there were no sophisticated instruments as today's scientists have, but it can hardly go without admiring the authenticity of the experiments our great grandmasters undertook on the effects of the emotions on the human being. Their viewpoint about the application of shruties was to create an effect that alters the emotional condition of a listener or excites a particular state of mind through the musical vibrations that are produced through either vocal or instrumental music compositions.

Our grandmasters did not know the exact frequency of the shruties, but they were well aware of the effectiveness and even colour of these microtones, hence they observed that "...when a feeling is excited in the mind, we usually find a manifestation in some part of the body. The pleasure expressed in the faces of lovers when they meet and the sadness when they long to meet but cannot, are feelings of love called Anubhavas."

Often we hear and see someone at a shrine hearing a musical composition and gets into haal (ecstasy) and begins strange kind of bodily movements which is mostly attributed to the supernatural or ghostly influence at the shrine. However, the fact remains that it is the effect of the infrasound of which the listener is not aware of. A person drowned in ecstasy at certain musical congregations related to religious congregations is nothing but the effect of the human feelings evoked by infrasound that is not generally inaudible and is picked up by simple-hearted people. This is what Wiseman calls soundless music and we attribute it as supernatural forces. Incidentally, our grandmasters made tremendous efforts in explaining this phenomenon, but their unawareness of its physics made it vulnerable to many interpretations.

if ur feelin lucky or u haf an xtra pair of balls attached (does not apply to ladies)

then try this.... but watch out for the depaaahment of humland security

• go to google



• now type in ' weapons of mass destruction ' in the seach bar



• press on 'I'm Feeling Lucky'

voila!!!


thanx to 'Anam'

Beauty and the Beast

Oxygen Inc.

The Lighter Side of Hacking
&
The Darker Side of Hacking
What the hell is the DARKSIDE? It's only a HUGE hacking database. Keep yourself tuned.

thanx umeed

How many babes can you scope without getting busted?

Flash Mountain showcases fun-loving flashers having wardrobe malfunctions in the most unusual places--like Disneyland.

by Paul Anderson

In all the heat generated by Pakistan's leading nuclear scientist, AQ Khan, confessing to nuclear proliferation, relatively little attention has been paid to the future of the country's nuclear weapons programme.

Read full story here.