mordant wit

Exploding Fireman

A man who claims he mistakenly had sex with "the wrong woman" after entering a dark bedroom at the home of a Sydney magazine editor was yesterday committed to stand trial for rape.

picotux - the smallest Linux Computer in the World



Technical Specs

The Ubuntu Linux project hopes to release later this year a groundbreaking product that could include support for virtualization and some mixed 32- and 64-bit architectures.

The next update to the Ubuntu version of Linux--Dapper Drake--is set for release on June 1, six weeks later than originally planned. The project will recommend this operating system release for people who need "super-solid and super-predictable results," Ubuntu's founder, Mark Shuttleworth, said on Wednesday. In contrast, the subsequent release, Edgy Eft, will be "cutting-edge, perhaps bleeding edge" with "brand-new code and infrastructure," he said.

"An eft is a youthful newt, going through its first exploration of the rocky territory just outside the stream. And that's exactly what we hope the development team will do with Ubuntu during the Edgy cycle--explore slightly unfamiliar and uncharted territory that is perhaps a little out of the mainstream," Shuttleworth wrote in an e-mail to project members.

The head of the Taleban in Pakistan's tribal areas has warned that there can be no peace in Afghanistan for as long as US forces remain in that country.

"We will not stop our jihad [holy war] against the Americans," Haji Omar told the BBC News website.

The Afghan government has repeatedly complained that militants in Pakistan are freely crossing the border to carry out attacks.

Pakistan denies that it is helping the Taleban fighters.

Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.

The average SMS text message is 16 characters long and contains only one correctly spelled word.

We do a lot of recruiting, here at Ye Olde Amazonne Headquarteres, and we've learned a ton about it in the past few years. Many of our lessons have been through trial and error. Like that time we discovered that you don't attract candidates by putting them in a tiny, crowded, poorly-lit, poorly-ventilated room, interviewing them mercilessly for 8 hours with only a lunch break, and booting them out with a quick "we'll call ya... a cab, that is." Thank goodness we've stopped doing that.

Although trial and error has taught us many lessons, perhaps our best source of information about ways to win at recruiting is the candidates themselves. They tell us all kinds of good stuff. For one thing, they often tell us what they like and dislike about our interview process. I can tell you this much: they all love the 'W' hotel in downtown Seattle. All of them. It must be nice. And they all dislike the US1 interview rooms (e.g. conf US US1 497, if you want to peer at one).

But candidates, especially college candidates, give us an even more valuable source of information. They have their collective ear to the ground, and they can tell us what the buzz is: who's hiring, which companies everyone wants to work for, which companies are known to be awful working environments, etc.

And most importantly of all, they tell us how other companies recruit.

A satirist is a man who discovers unpleasant things about himself and then says them about other people.

So you’ve seen the strangest iPod accessories, Lego creations, and even MP3 players, now our editors bring you the “Top 10 Strangest (or coolest) Home Gadgets”. Which ones are your favorites?

Print and Use!

Remarkable as it sounds, an Apple iMac, at least in most respects, can become the most appealing Windows computer in your house. The machine is blazing fast. Its beautiful 20-inch display could be your nicest.

This near-miraculous transformation is made possible, of course, thanks to Apple's Boot Camp software. You would have had to be buried under an MS-DOS computer to have missed the apocalyptic arrival of this "beta" program; Boot Camp lets owners of Macintoshes with Intel processors run Microsoft Windows XP. That's not all. Northern Virginia start-up Parallels has unveiled beta software that lets Macs and Windows live in harmony on the same system.

You may be delighted about being able to operate XP on a Mac, if only because the idea still seems so outrageous. Yes, Microsoft's Virtual PC "emulation" software has been able to do Windows, too, for some time. But it's agonizingly slow and not compatible with Intel Macs.

It's so simple, all you have to do is ask them nicely and they will start dancing in front of you. And when asked, they even don't mind if it ends up for their grandparents to see on the internet....

As a long-time Apple and UNIX user/programmer, I never aspired to work at Microsoft. (And I'm still a little surprised to be here.) I've never despised Microsoft like so many people seem to do — it's just that Microsoft products weren't a part of my world.

Then my wife got a job at Microsoft, so I needed to leave Caltech/JPL to work in Seattle. I didn't actually apply to Microsoft — a friend of ours who worked there circulated my résumé and Microsoft responded rapidly and set up a last-minute interview. Although I had five other offers, Microsoft made the best impression.

And so, here I am. I've been working at Microsoft since October, 1999 as a full-time Software Design Engineer. In that time, I've worked for three teams in two divisions, and had six or seven different managers. Four products I've worked on have shipped, two more are in beta, and I've also "consulted" for many other teams across the company, thereby influencing directly and indirectly a large number of Microsoft's products.



Excellent article! Read full text here!

Just click and see!

It is a saying that if you want to foresee the future of a nation, visit its educational institutions. These are places where the future of a nation rests, where the youth are inculcated with the sinews of morality and spirituality.

Education is a sensitive issue because it "trains the brains". Teachers and books play a pivotal role in the education and training of students.

They learn whatever their teachers and books impart. If the way of teaching is negative and unclear, it will simply ruin the capabilities of the children.

One can figure out the U-turns on political and economic fronts taken by Gen Pervez Musharraf led government after 9/11. But one does not understand the dreadful U-turn on the educational front.

No doubt, 9/11 has changed the world, but it cannot change the history and culture of Pakistan and Islam. However, Education Minister Lt-Gen (retired) Javed Ashraf Qazi, whose overt and covert capabilities have already brought Pakistan Railway to the zenith of progress, does not agree with this contention.

If you dare to click on this link!

This amazing video of the traffic conditions in Bangladesh! Pakistan and India are no different!

Just amazing how there is no accident!

1. Find a comfortable chair or couch in an area where you're unlikely to be disturbed. You may lie down on your bed if you wish, but if you think you might fall asleep, it's best to sit up or choose a chair.


2. Close your eyes and try to empty your mind. When you begin, you will find it difficult not to think. You may find that thoughts keep intruding. When this happens, don't try to force the thoughts out. Observe them impartially, and then let them slip away.


3. Observe the tension in your toes. Imagine that tension as something tangible, a specific color or shape. Then envision it lifting away from your body and drifting away. If you like, you can envision a cool liquid or white fog replacing the tension. Work your way up your body, relaxing each part individually. Visualize then relax your feet, calves, thighs, hips, stomach and so on, until you've relaxed each portion of your face and head.


4. Take slow, deep breaths. When you exhale, see the tension and negativity leaving in a dark cloud. As you inhale, see the air returning as a bright force filled with life and energy.


5. Appreciate the fact that you are now extremely relaxed. Tell yourself that you are going to count down from 10. Picture each number in your mind in detail. They can be huge block numbers, intricate golden figures, or whatever comes to mind. After each number, you will feel yourself drifting further and further into your subconscious mind. If you like instead, you can imagine yourself descending a staircase or ladder, as long as you imbue it with as much detail as possible. You may experiment and see which technique works better for you.


6. You are now in a deeply impressionable state. At this point, you should begin to address the issue you're concerned about. Speak in the present tense. Your subconcious mind does not understand negatives in speech - avoid using statements with negative connotation such as "I don't want to be tired and irritable.” Instead, say, "I am calm and relaxed.” Examples of positive statements for a variety of issues include: "I am stronger than smoking," "I am healthy and smoke free," "I am happy about my life," "I am no longer depressed," and "I am human and have no need to be embarrassed about [situation]."


7. Repeat your statement(s) to yourself as many times as you wish.


8. When you are satisfied, say to yourself that you will now count upwards from zero, and when you reach the number ten, you will slowly rise back to normal consciousness and remain calm and relaxed. Proceed to count upwards, again picturing the numbers in detail, or ascending your mental staircase.


9. Once you have ascended, give yourself a few moments before opening your eyes, and take your time getting up.

Samsung have announced what they claim is the world's thinnest mobile phone. The Samsung X828 beats the previous record-holder, the KTF EV-K100 (itself announced only two weeks ago!) by a full millimeter. One millimeter may not sound much, but given that the EV-K100 was only 7.9mm, the new Samsung X828's record-breaking 6.9mm is a full 12.7% thinner.

At these levels of thinness, that's a quantum leap! Even more amazing, it's half the size of Motorola's RAZR V3 (13.9mm), yet still packs a 2 megapixel camera, MP3 player and 80MB of memory! Stunning!

Hi, my name is Livia and I love my Mazda Protege. Even so, I decided to make a few improvements. Check 'em out!

Life is hard, so damn hard for swimsuit models. Imagine having to hang around beaches day in day out....

New York now leads the world's great cities in the number of people around whom you shouldn't make a sudden move.

Prior to 1903, Social Security numbers were only six digits, instead of the current nine, due to the far smaller population and being assigned only to male land-owners.

Like a lot of people nowadays, I have a growing collection of digital media. My digital media is stored on a home Linux server. Most of the digital media players available today do not support protocols to connect to a Linux server, which make them unsuitable for my use. I realized the best way to connect my digital media library with my home theatre was to build my own Linux home media center (LHMC).

Choose a main ingredient and a cuisine, let Google do the rest. Unfortunately, no "I'm Feeling Lucky" button.

Linus Torvalds has had an opportunity to examine the testing and analysis by Hans-Werner Hilse which we reported on yesterday, and has blessed it as being correct. The reason that the virus is not propagating itself in the latest kernel versions is due to a bug in how GCC handles specific registers in a particular system call. He has coded a patch for the kernel to allow the virus to work on even the latest Linux kernel.

Seth Lloyd is the kind of guy you'd like to have a beer with. Between gulps, the MIT prof will impart the details of how the universe really works. And if you order another, he'll give you a summary of one of the most mind-boggling ideas emerging in science today. His new book, Programming the Universe, is a plainspoken tale of how the universe is - tell me if you've heard this before - one very large quantum computer.

If you had to identify the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meeting".

Search for "insensitive jerk" on Yahoo! and check the first result!

Calling a piece of tech the "best" often starts an argument, but just about everyone knows a lemon when they see it. December is a long way away, but we couldn't wait to put together a list of the worst tech, tech events, and downloads of 2006. If there's a particularly horrendous gadget or tech happening you think we've missed, let us know in our TalkBack section. Here we go, in no particular order...

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the footpath, and stopped centimeters from a shop window.

For a second everything went quiet in the cab, then the driver said, "Look mate, don't ever do that again. You scared me!".

The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize that a little tap would scare you so much."

The driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault. Today is my first day as a cab driver - I've been driving a van carrying dead Bodies for the last 25 years..."

Google is interviewing candidates for engineering positions at our lunar hosting and research center, opening late in the spring of 2007. This unique opportunity is available only to highly-qualified individuals who are willing to relocate for an extended period of time, are in top physical condition and are capable of surviving with limited access to such modern conveniences as soy low-fat lattes, The Sopranos and a steady supply of oxygen.

Washing and bathing are religious requirements for Muslims, which is perhaps why they perfected the recipe for soap which we still use today. The ancient Egyptians had soap of a kind, as did the Romans who used it more as a pomade. But it was the Arabs who combined vegetable oils with sodium hydroxide and aromatics such as thyme oil. One of the Crusaders' most striking characteristics, to Arab nostrils, was that they did not wash. Shampoo was introduced to England by a Muslim who opened Mahomed's Indian Vapour Baths on Brighton seafront in 1759 and was appointed Shampooing Surgeon to Kings George IV and William IV.

They're high around the waist, wide around the leg and have lots of pockets for holding watches, bracelets, glasses and other knickknacks.

A new line of jeans designed by a small company in northern Italy caters to Muslims seeking to stay comfortable while they pray.

"As far as we know, we're the first, at least in Italy," said Luca Corradi, who designed Al Quds jeans.

The bagginess is to ensure that the wearer avoids stiffness while bending repeatedly during prayers. The pockets are for holding all the accessories Muslims have to take off while they worship. And the jeans have green seams -- because green is the sacred color of Islam.

Check out the moves he has: the body slam, the reverse body slam, the crouching jab, the double windmill.

One of the most surprising robots that appeared at the 9th Robo-One competition held here in Tokyo on March 18-19th, 2006, was LAYERED-X developed by Asurada. Its unique design allows it to reconfigure and transform itself into some amazing shapes. At first it looks like a short tower, then becomes a carousel, then a walking spider, then into a tall biped battle robot. It can even transform an arm into a new leg and keep on fighting. Really amazing.